Loves Me Not
by Cherralea
Summary: "He promised he would never hurt me, but in the end, he was the one that hurt me the most." Who could piece her back together again?
1. Chapter 1

**Title- Love Me Not**

**Summary- "He promised he would never hurt me, but in the end, he was the one that hurt me the most." Who could piece her back together again?**

**Disclaimer- I don't own Fairy Tail :(**

**Rating- T**

**Author's Note (IMPORTANT)- I'm sorry to those of you who read my original chapter. I deleted the first chapter of Love Me Not. This is a completely different story, although I used a portion of the original one that I posted (and deleted). I was going to delete the story, but I decided to change it completely. It is still RoLu, but the romance won't start until later. I hope you don't mind! Please give it a chance! **

I could hear the whispers as I passed the people in the street. "Mommy, who is she?" I heard a girl ask her mother. "Look, she has a Sabertooth mark." A cloak was covering my entire body, all except my right hand, which bore a crimson Sabertooth mark.

Steeling my nerves, I lifted my lips into a defiant smirk and shoved open the doors to the Fairy Tail guild. The guild members were in the middle of a bawl, drinking, laughing, and fighting. Silence evolved the guild and all eyes turned when they spotted my hooded figure. My eyes locked on a white haired girl, laughing at the bar with Bixlow. No one dared to walk up to me, until Lisanna boldly stood up.

"How dare you just barge in like that? Who are you?" she demanded.

Narrowing my eyes, I spat out, "What, _Lisanna_, you don't remember your old nakama?"

She scowls at me, as if daring me to reveal myself. "I'm pretty sure you are no nakama of mine."

"Oh really?" I threw back the hood revealing my face. Outraged gasps filled the room as all my former friends stared at me.

Lisanna backed away at the sight of me. All her defiance melted away, and she slumped back into a chair, guilt flooding her eyes. "Lucy," she whispered sadly. "You're back."

_**FLASHBACK**_

_"Natsu!" I said cheerfully, pecking my boyfriend on the cheek when he climbed into my apartment from the window. "Happy anniversary!"_

_"Happy anniversary, Luce," he said distantly. "I have something to tell you. Please don't hate me for this, but have you ever had feelings for someone when you're with someone else?" I nodded, confused. When he saw that I didn't understand what he was trying to say, he sighed, and continued. "I want us to break up." He hurriedly went on. "It's nothing personal, I swear! Lisanna's back, and I think I love her. I hope this doesn't ruin our friendship."_

_Shock flooded my body, then replaced by anger, and finally sadness. I felt tears stinging in my eyes, but I brushed them away. Plastering a fake smile on my face, I looked him in the eyes. I felt like bursting out crying as I said, "Don't worry about it, Natsu. I guess we're just not meant for each other. I'm happy for you, really. If she could make you happy, you should go for it."_

_Natsu, being the dense idiot he is, didn't notice my despair. A big grin broke out across his face, and he hugged me quickly. "Thanks, Luce. I knew you'd understand!" I watched him go. Quietly, so even his sensitive hearing couldn't catch it, I whispered, "I love you."_

_As soon as he jumped out of my window, I buried my face in a pillow, and cried. Why her? What did she have that I don't? I trusted him not to break my heart, and he shattered it when he left. Natsu, my best friend, my boyfriend, and my first love, torn away from me._

_I remember when he first asked me out. It was the best day of my life. I've always had a crush on him, and I was ecstatic with joy when he confessed his feelings for me. When Lisanna came back, he was more distant, spending more time with her than me, but I was supportive, because I knew how important she was to him._

_I gulped down the alcohol, ignoring the stinging of my throat. "More!" I demanded dizzily, throwing down a wad of jewels. The bartender replaced my drink with another, but as much as I tried, I couldn't escape my pain._

_Chugging down the drink, I swallowed the bitter liquid, feeling the dulling effects immediately. My vision turned blurry, but still I couldn't forget the image of Natsu and Lisanna together. The smile on his lips... the evident joy... the clear happiness that I couldn't give him._

_Gritting my teeth, I drowned the rest of my liquor. Slamming my hand onto the table, I slurred, "MORE!" Booze was a comfort, drowning my sorrows, quenching my pain, even for just a while. "Lucy, I don't think you should be drinking so much," Mira said worriedly. "Are you okay?" Lisanna was like her, in so many ways._

_Glancing behind me, I found Natsu and Lisanna in a tight embrace. Lisanna was blushing, her lips puffy and swollen. Natsu's eyes held warmth and love, a look never directed at me. All I ever saw was affection. Friendly affection, nothing more. "L-leave me alone," I garbled, grabbing for the beer._

_Chugging down one gulp after the other, I tried to intoxicate myself, attempting to burn the image of Natsu and Lisanna out of my mind. After five more drinks, my head clouded over, and I slumped back into my seat, my face red in my drunken state. It was so hard to breathe, knowing that Natsu wasn't mine anymore. In fact, he was never mine. He was Lisanna's from the very start._

_"W~why me?" I muttered sluggishly. "Th~at i-idiot."_

_Hiccupping, I turned to leave. I had to get out of here, out of the presence of the happy couple. No words could describe the unrequited love I had for my pink-headed teammate. Staggering out the guild doors, I felt dizzy and lightheaded. The cool air was refreshing, clearing my head of the alcohol. The throbbing in my head wasn't as painful as before._

_That awful memory surfaced once again._

"Lucy, you are a girl, right? What does girls like?" Natsu questioned eagerly.

I knew he wasn't interested in me anymore; we broke up. I knew that he liked Lisanna. But I couldn't help it as hope bubbled inside me. "Why do you ask, Natsu?"

"I want to ask Lisanna to be my girlfriend."

_Squeezing my eyes shut, I shook my head frantically. "Don't think about it!" I desperately tried to block that memory from my mind. Tears that I thought dried up ages ago surfaced again._

I watched as the love of my life walked away from me, into the arms of another woman.

"Lisanna, I love you. Will you be my girlfriend?" Natsu had an adorable blush on his face as he confessed, and when he saw the look on Lisanna's face, he quickly added, "You don't have to if you don't want to."

Lisanna's answer shattered my heart in a billion pieces. "Yes, I'll be your girlfriend! I love you, too."

_"Why her? Why not me?" I whispered as the tears spilled, dripping down my cheeks._

_"Lucy, are you okay?" Mira asked, noticing the unshed moisture in my eyes._

_I always turned away, saying, "I'm fine." But I wasn't fine. He broke me. He promised he'd never hurt me, but in the end, he was the one that hurt me the most._

_I stumbled back to my house, collapsing on my bed. A knock on the door pulled me back to reality. "Lucy, open the door! It's me, Lisanna." Lisanna? I instantly bolted up from the bed. The white-haired mage was just outside? I slowly opened the door, avoiding her searching eyes. "Mira told me you were here."_  
_I stared at her wearily with my red, puffy eyes. "I know."_

_"Is this because of Natsu?" she asked gently, and when I nodded sullenly, she went on. "I'm so sorry, Lucy, if it was me that came between you two. I won't date him if you don't want me to."_

_For a moment, I was selfish enough to say that yes, I didn't want her to date him. But when I opened my mouth to say it, I couldn't. I loved Natsu too much to sabotage his chance to date his dream girl._

_Somehow, I found the strength to tell her my decision. "It's okay, Lisanna. Date him. He really likes you. But please, promise me that you'll take care of Natsu. He's too reckless for his own good."_

_Lisanna beamed happily. "Thank you, Lucy! I promise you, I'll make him happy. I'd die before I let harm come to him." Quickly exciting through the door, she ran in the direction of the guild. I watched her as she ran straight into Natsu's arms, kissing him._

_Days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months. No matter how hard I tried, I couldn't get over him. I dated numerous guys, but the thought of Natsu held me back. I never thought that I could hurt more than I now, but somehow, my broken heart shattered once again when Lisanna entered the guild alone, tears streaming down her face, returning from a mission that her and Natsu went on together._

_Natsu was nowhere to be seen, and Lisanna walked over to me. "Lucy," she whispered sadly, "I'm sorry. I broke my promise to you." The strawberry smoothie in my hand fell to the floor as I froze, my face pale. Suddenly, I knew what happened._

_My voice shaking with anger, sadness, and heartbreak as I shouted at her: "You promised me! You promised to keep Natsu safe! You said that you would die before you let any harm come to him!"_

_Confusion filled the guild. Shouts were heard, but I couldn't feel anything but rage. Horrible, excruciating rage. "I'm sorry," Lisanna said quietly, her shoulders shaking with sobs. "The bandits were too much. One had me cornered, and was about to finish me off. Natsu took the hit for me. He's dead." Before she uttered those words, I had hoped that I was wrong._

_"It should have been you who died." I stood up and ran out of the guild._

_FLASHBACK END_

"Don't worry, I'm not back _permanently_," I told her, the sneer still on my face. "I'm just here for a visit."

Lisanna threw herself at me. "I'm so sorry!" She was crying, like the weakling she is.

"I have no interest in forgiving trash," I snapped harshly. Smiling cruelly, I glared at Bixlow. "I hear that you're dating _him_. Natsu died saving your pathetic ass, and this is how you thank him? By finding another guy within _a year_?"

She was crying so hard she couldn't speak. Erza walked towards me. "Lucy, you've changed," she said emotionlessly. "Don't blame Lisanna. She loved Natsu just as much as you did."

"Yes." I said angrily. "Loved. Past tense. She has moved on already; while I have always loved him. I never stopped. She ruined my life. She steals Natsu from me. She lets him _die _for her! She doesn't DESERVE a guy like him!" Uncharacteristically shouting now, I stepped closer to Erza. Lowering my voice to a whisper, I hissed, "_Lisanna_ is what killed him."

Uttering those words, I started walking away. Halfway out the doors, I turned back. "Oh, _Lisanna_. Did you even remember what day it is?"

Lisanna wiped away her tears. "What day is it?"

"Natsu's death anniversary." With that, I turned around and left.

**Author's Note- Please comment! It'll make my day!**


	2. Author's Note- Story on Hold

Hi, everyone! I'm officially putting this story on hold until further notice. It's just that I am really busy nowadays, with school and whatnot. So thanks for reading my story. (Don't worry, I plan on finishing it)


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